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Day twenty-five.

Someone who fascinates you and why.

I am constantly fascinated by the behavior of my now-ex. How someone can agree to help you with your internship and then say you talk too much when you mention that a family member’s health is in jeopardy is pretty confusing. He warmed up to me the other day for a fleeting moment, but I kind of ruined it. Well, c’est la vie. I’m gaining some valuable insight into human behavior from this.

I am also fascinated by Walt Disney. His ways of thinking combined the fantastical and the practical, the necessary and the extraneous (but necessary to those of us who see things in the same way). I almost wonder if he would have tested on the spectrum like me–it’s well known that his brother Roy was responsible for the business decisions due to Walt’s complete lack of common sense. But in a good way. And he knew the plight of the adult trapped with the child’s fantasy. He knew that many of us wished to escape in the way that he did, but didn’t have the place to.

I’ve always found visiting the theme parks to be a more effective mental health treatment than any therapy, but maybe that’s just me.

~Sam

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Day twenty-four.

Your favourite movie and what it’s about.

Do I have to pick one? There are WAY too many good films.

I suppose Xanadu is worth mentioning. Yes, it’s terrible. But I wrote a 12-page research paper on why it was decent despite being terrible, because it follows traditional mythology. And it’s adorable, you have to admit it. Gene Kelley’s last on-screen dance scenes are in here. It’s about a man named Sonny, an artist, who loses his inspiration until he is kissed by a greek Muse who inspires him to build a roller disco. Because THE FILMMAKERS COULD.

I also like Grease 2. Again, a shitty film from a film critic’s perspective, but a wonderful romp from mine.

Moulin Rouge is nice, too.

~Sam

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Day twenty-three.

Post photos of five guys (who are famous) you find attractive.

Oh, I knew they were famous. And since this was vague enough to warrant cheating…

I like the tall ones…

…And the short ones.

I like the ones who don’t have a lot to give…

…But I also love the ones with baggage. Preferably in the form of peanuts and fries and a tall Peach Sprite.

…Ohhhhhh, baby.

I love you, Five Guys. ❤

~Sam

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Day twenty-two.

How have you changed in the past two years?

I’ve come into my identity a lot more. When I was in high school, I didn’t really believe that I was autistic because there was still the ‘real autism’ debate going on within my circles and in the general community. It was a possibility but it was so hard to tell from the outside after years of adaptation to the neurotypical world that even I doubted myself.

Now, I know that there are thousands of women just like me, who are experiencing the same struggles and successes even without the formal diagnosis we all long for. So I feel a lot more solid about what’s part of that and what isn’t, and I try to improve myself daily either way.

When I was a senior in high school, I thought that I was going into the theatrical business. Now I’m just going into business, but with the same end goal of working in the theme park industry.

I used to be a lot less involved with things. Now, I at least have a few friends to rely on and a few places to go when I need them. I’ve become more of a loner in general, but I’m at least happy and confident about it.

I now speak three languages instead of only one and a half, which is very, very nice.

I guess I’m still a work-in-progress. I’m not terribly proud of who I am, but I am excited to see where I go in the future.

~Sam

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Day twenty-one.

One of your favourite shows.

Saturday Night Live. It’s a decent brand of humor that’s changed a bit through the past 40 years but is still surprisingly relatable. I bought a Hulu subscription JUST so I could binge-watch. Here’s hoping someone gets the rights for seasons 6-29 back soon…

~Sam

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Day twenty.

How important you think education is.

It’s insanely important. If I hadn’t gone on to college out here, I would have stayed in the tiny, opportunity-less town I grew up in, probably working for minimum while living at home. Or I would have ended up pregnant and married and probably still working more than full-time. But even that plight pales in comparison to that of uneducated people in other countries.

Education frees people from the cycle of poverty and it allows girls and women the opportunity to make their own choices in life. There are little girls who are 10 or 12 years old, getting married, having babies, being raped by their own ‘husbands’ while at the same time having their intelligence and potential stomped to the ground by the society they live in. In some countries, a girl trying to go to school will be SHOT IN THE HEAD by men who believe that women need not be educated. This is beyond ‘not okay’.

So, yes, we should probably start focusing on making sure that every boy and girl in the US is given a decent education, including a comprehensive sexual education, so as to prevent the cyclical nature of teen motherhood that is all but a plague where I came from and in many other places.

But we should also be championing the rights of the girl child worldwide, because Malala Yousafzai and every girl worldwide deserve access to a decent education and life without fear of retribution from extremists bent on making sure that they will not.

Enough soapboxing for today.

~Sam

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Day nineteen.

Disrespecting your parents.

Been there, done that, regretted most of it.

If my mother had known of my disability when I was a child I have a feeling we could have avoided a lot of the struggles. But I also am thankful for going under the radar for so long, because I got to avoid the horror that is ABA and other ‘therapies’ currently used on autistic kids that exploit them and force them into mindless parrots of ‘acceptable’ human behavior.

I regret hurting their feelings at times, but mostly I’ve moved on. It’s important not to dwell on things. I love my parents despite their faults. I just wish it was more socially acceptable not to be unconditionally in total agreement.

This topic was difficult to write about. I’ll stop before it gets too detailed.

~Sam

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